Who?What?Why?Where?AndHow?

I've recently been contacted by a very old friend who refered to me as a 'geezer'. Now I couldn't swear an oath on this, but I'd say what used to be a geezer has latterly become a 'dude'. For more guidance.... Might I suggest the followin:

A Beazer geezer = Someone who reads 1970's comics

A Breezer geezer = Someone with a taste for white rum mixed with a fruit based drink.

A Ceasar geezer = Any toga wearing megalomaniac.

A Freezer geezer = Will come round and repair your Electrolux.

Greaser geezer = 1960's motorcycle enthusiast who spent a lot of Bank Hlidays at the seaside.

Malteser geezer = Likes little circular light weight chocolatty thingy's with a crunchy centre.

She's a geezer = Refers to the transgendered.

Lisa geezer = Subsection of the above.

Trisa geezer = Ditto.

Piza geezer = From an area in the Northern part of Italy.

Teazer geezer = Into general ribaldry.

Wheezer geezer = An asthmatic.

Sneezer geezer = Someone affected by bright sunlight.

Pleaser geezer = A Sychophant.

He's a geezer = Any geezer not covere by the above.

Not that I wish to sound paranoid, but I appear to be being followed around the internet by a pair of college girls. At least it says they're college girls, but I seriously have my doubts. The seem to spend an awful lot of time exploring the cavities of each others mouths.

Perhaps I'm doing them a diseservice, perhaps they are taking an intense course in dentistry. Although, as far as I'm aware (and I've been under anesthetic once or twice) no dentist has ever probed my mouth in such a way.

I'm just a little confused as to why they should be on virtually every page that I view. I mean, there is nothing to profess their orthodontic skills. And by putting 'collegegirls' against them, doesn't inspire confidence in there experience o the job.

I wonder if they use mouth wash?

Many peoplw wonder (or at least I guess they do..... don't get too much call for social contact) why my name is what it is.

I guess a lot of people guess at it being a randomised jumble of letters pulled out of a Scrabble bag. But no!

Oggie was the word my mother called upon my entry into the world

And Splodge was the nearest they could get to the sound of this new born baby hitting the wall of the gynocological unit.

You know it just occured to me, I spent all that time (admittedly over 30 years ago now) in the religious education class - learning all about Mesopotamia and the ferile crescent (great name for a band, by-the-way!) and life during umpteen hundred and something BC between the banks of the Tigris and Euphrates.....
And, do you know what? In the last thirty years I have had absolutely no reason to call upon that knowledge whatsoever.
Likewise Venn diagrams...... Ditto that John Masefield poem that starts
"Quincermarine of Nineveh rowing home to distant Orphia"....
Okay.... so learning to read and write was pretty handy, likewise basic arithmatic.... but afer that, the most useful thing was that you could race pigs eyeballs down the window of the biology lab.... something about the membrane sticking.... it didn't matter, it worked. I also know what a tapeworm looks like now, though if I lost one in a bowl of pasta I wouldn't be able to spot it and if I did, i wouldn't be the one picking it out.
Can anyone explain to me what a logarithm is?
Can anyone explain to me what a logarithm is and make it sound interesting?

I'm going to sound really dumb here..... Does anyone know how to put a picture onto profile? I'd prefer it if people didn't give the answer as just "Yes"!

At just what point does the angry young poet become the cantankerous old git? Is there a crossover point, or just a gradual fade over?
Likewise invisiblity.
I accept the fact that as we get older we're noticed less. Jostled in the supermarket... walked passed in the street as though we're no more significant than the lesser spotted ameoba. A smile met with a stone wall look (not even the warmth of brick)...
It doesn't matter, because it's people that you don't know, but I've started to feel the same in my own home...
And hence starting this blog.... whoever reads it or not, it's been written.
This is my scream!